WAYS TO LEARN FROM PAST RELATIONSHIP FAILURES

Single Again? Take Heed Of The Old Adage "What Doesn't Break You Makes
You Grow Stronger" And Discover How To Find Something Positive In
Relationship Failures.
Breakups Might Leave You Feeling Bereft But Every Failed Relationship
Comes With A Lesson, Be It Good Or Bad. Ultimately They Will Help You
Establish What You're Looking For In A Match And Make You A Happier
And Healthier Person. Find Out How To Get The Best Out Of Difficult
Experiences And Your Newly Single Status.
1¤ TAKE STOCK OF YOUR OWN LIFE:
Don't Expect Future Partners To Fix You. In Fact, If Your Ideal
Partner Were To Find You In A Mess, Chances Are He Would Make A Speedy
Retreat. It's Vital To Take Steps To Change What It Is That You Don't
Like About Your Life. If You're Struggling With Debt, Attempt To Sort
The Situation, Little By Little. It's Up To You To Make Your Life
Appealing As A Single Person. You And Future Matches Need To Be Happy
As Individuals Before Becoming A Couple.
2¤ VALUE SINGLE TIME:
There Will Always Be Those Who Float From Relationship To
Relationship. But This Isn't Something To Envy. You Need To Be Able To
Rely On Yourself, Not Others. Time As A Singleton Helps You Heal After
A Breakup, Learn Your Lessons And Discover Your Own Resilience, Which
You Won't Be Able To Do If You Jump Straight Back Into A Relationship.
Plus, It Allow For Some Important 'ME' Time... And Being Single For A
Bit Can Be Fun!
3¤ LOOK IN THE MIRROR:
Blaming A Partner Entirely For A Breakup Won't Get You Anywhere. Look
At What You Could Improve About Your Own Behaviour In A Relationship.
Do You Communicate Your Feelings Enough? Are You Too Strong Headed?
Think About What Has Negatively Impacted Your Past Relationships
Before Entering A New One. But Also Establish Your Strengths As
Confidence Is Paramount.
4¤ ACCEPT THAT NOT ALL RELATIONSHIPS LAST:
Once You Accept That Some Relationships Are Temporary, You Can Learn
To Stop Blaming Yourself For What You See As Relationship Failures.
Instead Take Them For What They Are Helpful Life Lessons. They Might
Be Painful But Breakups Happen For A Reason.
As A Singleton, The Benefit Of Hindsight Should Help You See That You
Just Weren't Compatible With Previous Partners. Perhaps Your
Personalities Didn't Fit Well, Your Goal Weren't The Same And Your
Priorities Conflicted. If You're Honest With Yourself You'll Admit
That You're Much Better Off As A Result Of The Relationship And
Breakup Than You Would Have Been Had You Not Experienced Them At All.
"Choosing A Partner Successfully Is A Skill You Can Develop."

5¤ LEARN HOW TO APPLY LESSONS:

Look At Past Relationships And Reassess Your Priorities Now You're
Single. For Example, You May Never Have Known The Value Of Being
Someone Who Always Puts You First Had You Not Experienced A
Relationship With A Partner Whose Priorities Were Work, Hobbies Or
Friends, Or You mAY Not Have Realised The Importance Of Happy Family
Relationships If You Hadn't Dated Someone With A Dysfunctional Family.
Take These Lessons And Apply Them To Future Relationships, Looking For
Warning Signs Before It's Too Late.

HOW TO END BAD RELATIONSHIP PATTERNS

Being Single Gives You Valuable Time To Reflect On The Past Before
Committing Yourself To Someone New. But Even If You're In A
Relationship, You Can Use Previous Experiences As Lessons For The
Present. If Things Keep Turning Sour, Spotting The Patterns Can Help
You Make Positive Steps For The Future.

Here Are The Four "Key Indicators" To Look For As A New Relationship Commences:

1¤ HOW IS THE INITIAL EMOTION HANDLED?

The Beginning Of A New Relationship Can Be Very Revealing. Think About
The First Few Days, Weeks And Months When You Moved From Being Single
To Part Of A Couple. Some Relationships Start With Intense Infatuation
Which Can Often Become Physical Prematurely With Confused Implications
About Commitment. Others Progress Much More Steadily And Rationally.

Look At Your Past Relationships And Establish Whether There Are
Similarities. There's Nothing Wrong With Strong Attraction, But It's
How You Handle This Passion That Can Cause A Relationship To Develop
In A Healthy Or Unhealthy Way.

2¤ HOW QUICKLY DO THINGS DEVELOP?

Look Back To The Most Significant Moments Of Past Relationships: The
First Kiss Or First Time A Gesture Of Commitment Was Made. By
Pinpointing These Moments You Can Establish Whether A Relationship Has
Progressed At An Even Or Hurried Pace.

If Things Are Too Rushed, It Could Suggest That One Or Both Partners
Are Overeager, Insecure And Impulsive. The Most Stable Relationships
Develop Steadily And Gradually.

3¤ WHO DO YOU TEND TO GET INVOLVED WITH?

People Are Often Drawn To Partners With Similar Flaws. Compare Your
Past Partners And Identify Whether Their Character Traits Match Up.
Before You Relinquish Your Single Status, Make Your Potential New
Partner Is Significantly Different From Your Last.

4¤ DO YOUR PARTNERS HAVE SIMILAR BACKGROUNDS?

As Well As Their Personality Traits, Consider Their Family
Backgrounds. Do They Come From Broken, Volatile Or Chaotic Homes? Look
At What Impact This Has Had On Your Relationship.

By Examining Your Relationship Past You Can Help Ensure A Happier Future.

WHY A MAN WON'T EMOTIONALLY COMMIT

One Of The Most Common Situations Ladies Ask Me About Is What I Call
"Predictable Male Withdrawal." I'll Take A Second To Explain Exactly
What This Is And Why It's Important...

In The Early Stages Of Dating, A Man Is Often Attentive, Affectionate,
And Willing To Do Anything To Stay Close To You. He Talks About His
Life, His Feelings And Wants To Know Everything About You. He Wants To
Make Sure You Have Incredible Experiences Together.

But Then It Happens...

At Some Point You Sense A Shift In Him. His Openness And Curiosity
Fades. He Rarely Wants To Talk About Your Feelings Or The
Relationship. He Seems Distant And Withdrawn. You Worry About Your
Feelings Or The Relationship. He Seems Distant And Withdrawn. You
Worry About It, And Wonder Why Suddenly You're The Only One Who Cares
About The Relationship. Unfortunately, Pointing This Out To Him Only
Adds To The Tension And Distance You Feel.

¤ UNDERSTANDING MEN AND PATTERNS OF WITHDRAWAL:

There's A Hard Truth About Most Men When It Comes To Dating. A Man
Either Won't Tell You, Or Doesn't Know Himself, Whether Or Not He's A
"Withdrawer" In Relationships.

For Example, A Man Would NEVER Say To A Woman-

"I'm Looking For A Committed Relationship... But The Truth Is That I'm
Not 100% Emotionally Available. I'll Put You On An Emotional
Rollercoaster By Periodically Pulling Away From You. But Hey... Want
To Go Out Sometime?"

Part Of The Beauty Of Online Dating Is That You're Able To Get A Rich
Sense Of The Man You're Connecting With Before You Meet In Person. But
There's One More Important Thing You'll Want To Know- Whether Or Not
He'll Grow To Be More Loving As The Relationship Grows, Or If He'll Be
The Kind Of Man That Periodically Gets Distant, Therefore Bringing Up
Your Fears And Uncertainty.

¤ IDENTIFYING "WITHDRAWERS"... AND WHAT TO DO IF YOU'RE WITH ONE

The Best Way To Know A Man's Emotional Habits In Relationships. Is He
Close To His Family And Friends? What Does He Say About Them? Is He
Loving And Surportive Of Them? Or Is He Constantly Negative And
Dismissive Of Them?

There's A Lot You Can Tell About A Man By Simply Listening And Observing.

So What If You're Already With A Withdrawer? Follow These Tips To Keep
Your Sanity:

Tip #1) AVOID FALLING INTO THE COMMON ROLE OF THE "CONVINCER"

When You Sense A Man Is Less Available To You, And It Scares You, The
Common Reaction Is To Unconsciously Convince A Man To Stay And Open Up
Emotionally. This Usually Shows Up As Subtle Begging, Whinning, Or
Pouting In Order To Change His Behaviour.

Unfortunately, These Are The Exact Kinds Of Behaviours That Seem
"Needy" To A Withdrawn Man, And Cause Him To Want To Pull Away More.

Tip #2) KEEP YOUR CENTER:

The Quickest Way To Connect With Someone, Especially A Man, Is To Be
The Kind Of Positive, Magnetic Person That They Can't Help But Be
Changed And Inspired By.

When We Feel Uncertain And Worried, We Often Put More Attention And
Focus On The PROBLEMS We See. But, As The Saying Goes, Sometimes The
Best Medicine Is Laughter. Try To Look At Problems In Your
Relationship As OPPORTUNITIES For Love, Growth And Understanding.

To Maintain A Positive Attitude, You Have To Have A Full Life- Without
A Man. Don't Stop Doing The Things That Make You Feel Great About
Yourself And Your Life.

Tip #3) LEAD WITH ATTRACTION:

Talking About Your Relationship "Issues" Will Never Change A Man. What
Does Change Him Is The Magic Power Of ATTRACTION. Remember What Drew
You To Him In The First Place. It's Not Just Physical Attraction, But
Emotional Attraction That Creates A Strong, Unbreakable Bond Between
You And A MAN.

WHY DO SOME MEN CHEAT ON THEIR BEAUTIFUL WIVES?

Most Men Seem To Think That If They Can Find A Woman Who Is
Attractive Enough, They Will Never Stray. This Is One Of The Many
Drivers Of The Male Animal's Search For A Very Attractive Mate, But
Clearly That Idea Has Some Problems.
The Fact That Some Famous And Successful Man After Man Is Willing To
Burn Down His Marriage And Career For The Pleasures Of An Affair
Raises A Variety Of Interesting Questions About Human Behaviour. Why
Do They Do It, When They Seem To Have Everything At Home?
HERE ARE SOME THEORIES:
1¤ A Powerful Man Who Has The Opportunity Is A Good Candidate To
Cheat. Their Wife's Attractiveness Has Nothing To Do With It.
2¤ This Just Proves That Trying To Find The Most Attractive Mate Is A
Silly Exercise. Once The Marriage Gets Going, How Attractive The
People Are Has No Bearing On How Happy, sAD, Honest Or Faithful They
Will Be.
3¤ No Woman Can Be Beautiful Enough To Keep A Man Faithful. There Has
To Be Something Else At Play To Have Him Remain Fully Committed To The
Relationship.
It Is Always Difficult To Understand Why A Man Will Cheat, Especially
On A Very Beautiful Woman He Has. But It Happens All The Time.
After Speaking To Several Of My Male Friends On This Topic, I Have
Decided To Share Some Of The Reasons They Gave As To Why Most Men
Cheat On Their Beautiful Partners.
If You Think You Are Beautiful And That Means Your Man Will Be
Faithful And Glued To You Alone, Then You Are Up For The Big Shock.
Being Exceptionally Beautiful Does Not Guarantee Faithfulness In The
World Of Men.
This Is Why So Many Beautiful Women Have Been Cheated On And Are So
Insecure In Life. These Women Know That, Being Physically Beautiful
Will Attract The Men But Then It Takes More Than That To Keep Them For
Yourself Only.
If A Man Is Cheating On His Beautiful Woman, Then It Is One Or More Of These;
SHE KNOWS NOTHING MORE THAN LOOKING BEAUTIFUL:
It Is True That Men Love To Be With Beautiful Women, Especially Those
Who Know How To Project Glamour And Prettiness All The Time. However,
Men Quickly Get Bored With Looks And Begin To Look Beyond The Physical
Appearance.
Faithfulness Hardly Comes From Physical Attraction, Emotional
Connection Is Needed To Seal A Deal On Faithfulness.
When A Woman Is Only Good To Be Showcased Around In Beauty, Men Begin
To Look Out For The Important Things That Make Up A Loving
Relationship. For Instance, A Man Wants To Be Taken Care Of And If A
Beautiful Woman Won't Bend Over To Get That Done, He Will Surely Look
Around For Where He Can Find That.
Also, No Matter How Rich A Man Is, He Will Love To See His Woman Do
Something With Her Life. So If A Beautiful Woman Has Nothing Important
Going On In Her, Apart From Watching Reality TV Shows And Painting
Nails, The Man Is Set To Look For 'Woman Inspiration' Somewhere...


SHE IS UGLY INSIDE:

There Are Several Beautiful Women Out There Who Will Give You A Heart
Attack When They Walk Pass Your Man As A Woman That You Are. Despite
Their Beauty, These Women Are Not Able To Get A Man To Stay Faithful.

Have You Ever Wondered Why That Man Who Has Such A Beautiful Partner
Won't Stop Bothering You? You May Think She Is Far Beautiful That You
And That Is Probably A Fact. But She Is Ugly Like Hell Inside.

When It Comes To Beauty, Most Men Are Confused... One Minute They Want
The Woman Who Looks Like A Model. The One They Can Show Around To
Friends And Walk Around Holding Her Hands Whiles Every Other Man Gets
Jealous.
The Next Minute They Are Looking For The Inside Beauty, Which Is The
Calmness, Kindness, Support, Understanding, Softness And Love That The
Not So Beautiful Girl They Know Possesses.

At This Stage, They Start To Move Back And Forth Between The Not So
Beautiful Woman And Their Beautiful Partner.

THE SEX IS NOT GOOD:

There Are Some Women Out There That Know How To Really Rock A Man's
Boat. Being Beautiful Does Not In Any Way Mean You Are A Boat Rocker
In Bed. For A Woman To Be Able To Blow The Mind Of A Man, She Must Be
A Person Who Pays Attention To Details And Responses.

If The Woman Is Good IN Bed, Then The Man Will Keep Coming Back. NO
Matter How Beautiful A Woman Is, If The Man Is Not Getting The
Satisfaction He Thinks He Deserves And She Is Not Ready To Make
Improvements, Time Will Catch Up On Her And He Will Sneak To Get What
He Is Missing From Somewhere.

Anytime You Meet A Couple With One Beautiful So Cute And The Another
Being Just Normal, Do Not Ask How It Happened, Because It All Happens
When They Enter The Bedroom.

Why Do You Think Some Men Cheat On Their Beautiful Women?

WAYS TO BETTER YOURSELF AND YOUR PARTNER

Inspiring Your Partner To "Greatness" Is Not Rocket Science. To
Paraphrase The Wisdom Of The Golden Rule: Simply Be The Partner You
Want To Have.

Here Are Six Ways To Begin:

1* SAY YES:

From The Moment In Adolescence When We Start Caring What Other Boys Or
Girls Think Of Us, The Word "Yes" Becomes A Kind Of Romantic Holy
Grail We Seek Like A Questing Knights. We Want To Hear, "YES, I'll Go
To The Dance With You. YES, We Should Hang Out. Yes, I Like You." It
Is The Clearest Sign That We Are Worth Something. Yet As We Get Older,
A Mindless Habit Of Negativity Often Sets In. Along The Way We Learn
To Resist One Another For No Apparent Reason. Who Knows Why? The Point
Is, If You Want Your Partner To Be More Affirming And Positive, Try
Going With The Flow Yourself More Often. Practice The Magical Power Of
"YES."

2* SAY NO WHEN YOU MUST... BUT LOVINGLY AND RESPECTFULLY:

Of Course, There Are Times When "YES" Is The Wrong Answer, Period.
There Is Nothing Magical About Failing To Protect Your Boundaries And
Your Autonomy. But It Is Equally Important That, When You Have Reason
To Disagree With Your Partner, You Do So In A Way That Safeguards
Their Dignity. Too Many Relationships Are Poisoned By A "NO" That Is
Unnecessarily Harsh Or Mocking. Guard Against Giving Them The Idea
That They Are Being Scolded. Respect Is Contagious, So Give It Freely
And It Will Come Back To You.

3* BE LOYAL:

Okay, That Sounds Like A Girl Scout Motto. But Too Many Women And Men
Take Any Opportunity To Trash Talk Their Partners Around Friends And
Family, Sometimes Even When They're Present. If You Have Developed
That Harmful Habit, Cut It Out. No One Enjoys Public Critism. If You
Have Something On Your Mind, Talk To Them-In Private. They Are Sure To
Notice And Reward You For It, By Giving You The Same Courtesy.

4* LOOSEN UP:

Feeling Caged By Too Little Freedom In A Relationship Will Bring Out
The Lion In Anyone. Preempt The Problem By Giving Them Plenty Of
Space. That Is Not To Say You Should Have No Expections Of Them,
Especially As The Relationship Advances. But Heavy-Handed Possessive
Is A Great Way To Put Anyone On The Defensive. When You Keep A Light
Touch, They'll Relax, And So Can You.

5* GIVE THEM A PUSH:

There Comes A Time In Nearly Every Person's Life When The Dream That
Propelled Them Forward Seems To Be Receding Further Out Of Reach.
Maybe He Or She Has Faltered. Maybe They Are Stuck In The Daily Grind
Of Life. Maybe They've Gotten Plain OL' Lazy. Then It's Time For You
To Give Them A Gentle Nudge-Or A Firm Shove-By Reminding Them Of Their
Terrific Potential. Believe The Best About Them, And Tell Them So.

6* LISTEN:

Paying Attention To What Your Partner Has To Say Is One Of The Highest
Possible Expressions Of Romantic Affection. Most Of Us Go Through The
Day Relatively Unnoticed And Unheard-by Bosses, Co-Workers, Even
Friends And Family Members. Be The Excepion In Their Life. Listen, And
Show Them You Are Deeply Interested In Who They Are And What They Case
About.