WHAT WOMEN REALLY WANT

Its Been The Subject Of Movies, Books And Countless Conversations:
What Do Women Really Want? Specifically, What Do Women Want From A
Mate? We Know, Guys, That It Can Seem Impossible To Guess What Women
Are Looking For, But It's Really Not That Complicated.
Because We Are Human And We All Want Different Things, We Can't Tell
You What Every Woman Wants. But We Have A Pretty Good Clue. Check Out
These Five Things That Women Want.
1• WOMEN WANT YOU TO LISTEN UP:
In General, Women Complain That Men Don't Listen To Them. In Your
Defense, You Listened To Her The First Time As Well As The 21st Time
She Aired Her Concern, But She Continues To Mull It Over And Discuss
Some Possibilities. She Carries On About Her Overbearing And Unfair
Boss, So You Suggest Quitting Her Job•
Guys, Admit It: A Lot Of You Are "Fixers." You Listen To A Problem
For Three Minutes Before You Offer Up A Suggestion. Why? You Want Your
Girlfriend, Wife Or Friend To Be Happy, So You Provide A Solution To
The Problem•
It May Seem Contradictory, But Women Don't Necessarily Want An Answer
Or A Solution. They Actually Want You To Act As Their Sounding Board.
Instead, Listen Patiently And Let Her Work Through It, Offering Advice
When Prompted•
2• WOMEN WANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY:
The Fact That Women Want To Be Taken Seriously Is Closely Linked To
Point #1. Not Only Do Women Want To Be Listened To, They Want Their
Problems, Thoughts And Feelings To Be Taken Seriously.
Before You Dismiss The Idea, Consider The Fact That Maybe Your Girl
Does Know How To Rewire The Bathroom Or How To Organize Your
Investments. Who Says That Sound Advice Can't Come In A Sweet-Smelling
Package? Defer To Her Opinions And Give Her Ideas A Whirl Sometime.
You Just May Find That Her Second Opinion Is Seriously Prudent.
3• WOMEN WANT TO BE CONSIDERED:
When You're Making Plans Amid The Poker Games, Guys' Nights Out And
Work, Women Want To Be Considered When You're Making Plans. (Wouldn't
You?) Women Don't Necessarily Need To Be THE Priority- They Just Don't
Want To Be An Afterthought. Whether You Are A Workaholic, Gamer,
Sportsman Or Couch Potato, Let Your SweetHeart In On The Action.
Sometimes It's Easy To Let Everything Else Get In The Way, But If You
Make Her Feel Important And Needed, She Will Make You And Your Needs
Just As Significant As You Make Her•

4• WOMEN WANT TO BE ADORED:

Women Love To Feel Adored. Honored As The Most Beautiful Girl In The
Room, She Wants You To Positively Love What She Is All About. So Maybe
There Are Smarter, More Attractive Or More Successful Women Out There,
But To You, She Is The Bee's Knees. Your Esteemed Ladylove Wants To
Feel That You Are Fortunate To Have Her, That You Can't Keep From
Beaming When You See Her Or Even That She Makes Your Life Better For
Being In It. Feeling Your Devotion Will Only Encourage Her To
Reciprocate And Feel Lucky Herself For Garnering Such A Good Man•

5• WOMEN WANT ACKNOWLEDGMENT AND APPRECIATION:

Women Want You To Acknowledge The Things They Do For You. They Want
More Than Just A Pat On The Back: They Want To Be Appreciated For
Their Efforts. No Matter What Her Role In Your Life, Whether It's
Making Plans, Fixing Up The House Or Booking Dream Vacations, She
Wants You To Be HAPPY.

Try To Meet Her Halfway With Proactive Measures Or At Least Offer Some
Sort Of Recognition Or Acknowledgment. A Little Goes A Long Way With
Your Female Counterpart, So Take Notice And Compliment Her On Her
Attention To Detail•

COULD NAGGING ACTUALLY BE WORSE THAN CHEATING?

Is Nagging Really So Bad? After all, Most Of Us Seem To Think Of
Nagging As Annoying, But Pretty Benign And Harmless. And Some Of Us
Feel Like We'll Never Get What We Want Unless We Ask For It In 50
Million Ways. Yet Almost A Year Ago, A Wall Street Journal Columnist,
Elizabeth Bernstein, Made The Provocative Claim That Nagging Is A
"Marriage Killer... More Common Than Adultery And Potentially As
Toxic."
A Little Science Supports That Provocative Claim. Howard J. Markman,
Professor Of Psychology At The University Of Denver And The
Co-Director Of The Center For Marital And Family Studies, Spent 30
Years Studying Conflict Patterns And Divorce. His Team Found That
Negative Conflict Patterns, Consistent With Nagging, Attack Love And
Jack Up The Risk Of Unhappiness And Potential Divorce. Markman Knows
Something We All Know: Nagging Is Common. And Therein Lies Its
Inherent Danger. Your Relationship Is Like A House In A Falling Rock
Zone: Nagging Frequently Causes Rocks To Roll Onto Your House And Chip
Away Love, While Cheating Triggers An Avalanche. You Stay On The
Lookout For Avalanches, But May Be Unaware Of The Long-Term Damage
Done By The Frequent Falling Rock•
So While Nagging May Actually Not Be Worse For Our Marriages Than
Cheating (Falling Rocks Versus Avalanche), Maybe We Need To Recognize
It As A Genuine Detriment To Relationships. I Can Think Of Three
Important Ways That Persistent Nagging Can Erode A Relationship's
Foundation•
FIRST UP: COMMUNICATION•
Let's Explore A Scenario: The Nagger Gets Really Nervous Whenever
Nagged One Drives On Long Vacations. He's More Aggressive Behind The
Wheel And That Triggers Her Anxiety. So She Reminds Him Of The Speed
Limit Every Five Minutes, And Uses Hand And Foot Signals To Encourage
Him To Slow Down. With Each Hour, Nagger's Voice, Hand, And Foot
Signals Become More Emphatic, And Nagged One Becomes Less Attentive Or
Maybe Explodes In Irritation. Neither Spouse Feels Understood, And
Most Likely Neither Understands The Other. Nagging Hijacks Empathic
Communication•

SECOND UP: CONNECTION•

When Was The Last Time You Wanted To Cuddle Up With Your Spouse After
Being Nagged- Or After Nagging? Usually The More One Nags, The Faster
And Farther The Other Runs... Literally Or Figuratively. If You Nag
Your Wife About Something On The Way To A Nice Restaurant, An Evening
Out May Lose Its Sparkle Before Drinks Are Served. If The Two Of You
Are Trapped In A Nagging Cycle, You May Confuse Your Struggle
(Nagging) With Your Identities (Two People Who Can't Get Along).
Nagging Can Make You Lose Track Of Who You Are: Two People Who Love
Each Other And Struggle With An Ineffective Communication Habit. Think
About Changing Your Habit Before You Dream About Changing Your
Partner•

THIRD UP: TRUST•

If You Are The Nagger, You May Feel Uncared For If Your Spouse
Repeatedly Rejects Your Persistent Pleas. If You Are Nagged, You May
Correctly Think That Your Spouse Does Not Trust You To Be Responsible
In A Particular Area Or In Many Areas. When Nagging Becomes
Entrenched, You Each May Feel Like The Other Does Not Have Your Back.
Trust Erodes- Not Because Nagger And Nagged One Are Inherently Flawed-
But Because Each Is Persistently Trapped In An Ineffective
Communication Pattern. What If Nagger Clearly States What He/She Wants
And Explains Why, And Nagged One Honestly States His/Her Intention And
When He/She Will Comply? Each May Need To Compromise A Little, But
Trust Will Begin Grow. (And They Can Throw Away Their Nagging Labels)•

So Maybe Nagging Can't Bring Home An Avalanche Like Cheating Can. But
If It Persist Unabated In Your Relationship, It Can Become An
Off-The-Radar Marriage Killer. Perhaps It's Time To Take Another Look
At This Communication Pattern In Our Relationships•

Have You Been In A Relationship Where Nagging Was A Real Issue?

MOST IMPORTANT QUESTIONS YOU CAN ASK

Have You Noticed That Conversations ArE Beginning To Take On That
Familiar New Year Cadence? Friends, Family And Colleagues Are Sharing
Ideas About Resolutions, About Things They Are Determined To Change
About Themselves•

Last Year 45% Of Us Made New Year's Resolutions, Yet In Spite Of Good
Intentions, Only 14% Of Us Achieved Them, According To The Journal Of
Clinical Psychology. These Were Not Insurmountable Goals; The Top 3
Resolutions Were To Lose Weight, To Get Organized And To Spend
Less/Save MorE•

So Why Do So Few Of Us Accomplish What We Set Out To Change? We Make
These Commitments And At The Same Time Only Half-Heartedly Expect
Them To Come To Fruition. It's Not Because These Ain't Worthwhile
Goals Or That We Don't Care. They Just Are Not Answers To The Kinds Of
Questions That We Really Need To Ask Ourselves. We Need To Ask The
Game Changing Questions That Will Yield Our True Commitment•

Take A New Approach In 2014. Rather Than Obsessing About Losing
Weight, Try Asking Yourself How You Can Actively See To Make Yourself
And The World A Better Place•

අ Rather Than Losing Sleep Over Regrets, Ask Yourself: 'How I Can
Leave A Legacy So That My Values Live On?

අ Rather Than Holding On To Old Battles, Ask Yourself: Do I
Communicate Honestly, Openly An Fairly?


අ Rather Than Focusing On The Last 5 Pounds, Ask Yourself Openly AND
What Makes You Com Alive?'

Create A Vivid Picture Describing Your Well-Lived Life. Only Then Can
You Create An Authentic ActiON Plan To Measure Progress Towards Those
Goals•

Try It Out, And Let Us Know How It Worked For You!

Visit Our BLOG For Articles That Would Be Of Great Help To You In Your
Relationship/Marriage, Friendship And Even Business:
www.Deedollar.Blogspot.Com

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS GROUP OF COMPANIES™ © Copyright 2014•

RELIGHT YOUR FIRE

Recent Research Suggests That Compared To Past Times People Are
Working An Extra 6-10 Hours Per Week With Only 32% Stopping To Take A
Full Lunch. Despite Countless Articles Written Each Year Aimed At
Helping Create Balance And Quality In Life, People Are Still
Overworking And Expecting To Achieve More. When You Burn The Candle At
Both Ends, Productivity Decreases And You Are Left Overwhelmed,
Overworked, Overstressed And Overcommited•

A Break From The Norm Will Recharge Your Energies, But In Terms Of
Yielding Longterm Results The Benefits May Only Be Shortlived•

In Order To Enhance Your Effectiveness The Long Term, You Need To
Maintain And Develop The Greatest Asset That You Have Yourself. Its
Essential That You Take Time To Refresh Your Skills Enhance Your
Knowledge And Develop Your Capabilities. Take Time To Tap Into The
Potential You Always Knew You Had. Read A Book, Listen To A Great
Speaker On Audio Or Attend A Programme Focused On Developing Your
Potential•

Ensure That You Are Resiliant Enough To Deal With All The Obstacles
That Life Is Giving You. Invest In Yourself So That You Are Physically
Charged And Mentally Focused. If You Feel That Your Fire Is Burning
Out Then Add Some Spark To It Again. Recharge, Reignite And Reenergise
And Be The Best You Can Be•

DO YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO APOLOGIZE?

I Was Thinking About Apologies And I'm Pretty Sure I Came Up With A
Perfect Analogy. What Are Apologies Like? Apologies Are A Lot Like
Weeds: Once In A While, They're Pretty, But They're Usually Just
Annoying. Similarly, If You Think About The Countless Apologies You've
Probably Heard In The Past Year Alone, You Can Only Remember One Or
Two Specifically- And Those Were Either Really Good Ones Or Really Bad
Ones.
Bottom Line On Apologies: Most Of Them Aren't Thoughtful Or Sincere.
For Most Of Us, Making A Mistake Usually Results In The Fear That We
Will Get In Trouble Or Be Punished, So We Throw Out A Quick "I'M
SORRY" To Stop A Potential Argument And Avoid Getting In Trouble.
Often Someone Issues An Obligatory Apology And Makes A Sad Face To Go
Along With It, Convinced That All The Necessary Components Of An
Apology Have Been Met. Did I Say, "I'M SORRY?" Check. Did I Look Sad?
Check. Which Brings Us To How To Offer An Apology The Right Way.
I Don't Actually Have To Say The Words, "I'm SORRY?"
It's A Total Paradox But A Good Apology Doesn't Have To Include The
Words "I'm Sorry" Or "I Apologize." The Truth Is That A Good Apology
Includes Three Components: Acknowledging The Other Person's Feelings;
Taking Ownership Of What You Did That Caused Upset; And Assuring Him
Or Her That You Won't Make The Same Mistake Again. For Specifics, I'll
Give You Some Examples Of Good And Bad- No, Atrocious- Apologies•
EXAMPLES OF GOOD APOLOGIES
"I Know You've Asked Me Not To Flirt With Other People. At The Time, I
Honestly Didn't Think I Was. Now I Realize You Were Right, And That
Wasn't Right Of Me To Do That. I Won't Do It Again." NOTE: Did You See
The Words, "I'M Sorry?" Okay, Then My Job Is Almost Done Here!
"I Have Spent The Day Trying To Understand Why You Were Upset. I
Finally Get It. I Wasn't Thinking About Your Feelings, Only My Own. If
I Ever Do That Again, Honey; I Will Deal With This Because I Care
About You." Note: This One Is Especially Good Because The Apologizer
Actually Took Time To Reflect On The Behaviour (e.g, "I Have Spent The
Day Trying To Understand Why...). In Each Of The Good Apologies, It
Feels As If The Apologizer Is Conceding, And Is No Longer In A Power
Struggle To Win Or Be Right•
BAD APOLOGIES
"I Heard You; You Keep Saying It. I'm Sorry, Okay? I Said I Won't Do
It Again." Note: I Don't Know About You, But I Don't Want To Be On The
Receiving End Of This Apology.
"Apologize To You? What About Me? You Think You're The Only One Who
Did Anything Wrong Here?" Note: Enough Said. "I Know I Shouldn't Have
Done What I Did, But You Kind Of Set Me Up For It. You Bring It Out Of
Me, And It's Hard To Control Myself When You Push Me Too Far." Note:
Turning The Tables Is Of The Most Common Tactics For Narcissists. They
Avoid Accountability At Costs And Frequently Try To Turn The Tables,
Causing The Other Person To Feel Confused And To Ultimately Back Down•

This Kind Of Apology Is Especially Toxic. If You Get This Type Of
Apology From Your Partner, You Need To Seriously Evaluate The
Relationship. Among The Bad Apologies, You'll See How They Keep The
Disconnect And Arguments Alive. Bad Apologies Are Yet Another Attempt
To Try To Show The Other Person You Were Right All Along•

WHEN IS IT TIME TO APOLOGIZE?

Because Everyone Has A Different Personality Style, Everyone Deserves
A Little Wiggle Room When It Comes To The Timing Of An Apology. The
Ideal Apology, Of Course, Involves Someone Apologizing Right Away. Yet
Some People Need A Little Time To Retreat To Their Own Corner Before
They Can Return To The Group And Play Nicely. I Crawl Out Of My Skin A
Bit Each Time Someone Flippantly Announces Their Approach To
Relationship Problems In The Following Way: "We Have A Rule Where WE
Never Go TO Bed Angry." Child, Please! If Only Life Were That Easy. If
Someone Needs An Evening Or Even A Couple Of Days To Reflect Before
Coming Back With An Apology, Its Okay. If You Are Waiting For An
Apology, Distract Yourself With An Activity That Absorbs Your Mental
Energy And Be Patient. The Apology May Come Sooner Than You Imagine,
But You Can Also Always Ask For An Apology In A Couple Of Days If You
Haven't Yet Received It. By That Time, The Two Of You Will Probably
Have A Much More Effective Conversation As A Result•

Have You Received Any Good Apologies Lately? Or Just The Toxic Kind?