WHY LOVE LITERALLY HURTS?

Many People Believe That Love Is A Sensation That Generates When Mr Or Mrs Right Appears... No Wonder So Many People Are Single. Many People Approach A Relationship Either Consciously Or Unconsciously, They Believe Love Is A Sensation Based On Physical And Emotional Attraction That Magically/Spontaneously Generates When That Special Person Appears. And Just As Easily, It Can Spontaneously Degenerate When The Magic Just Isn't There Anymore. You Fall In Love, And You Can Fall Out Of Love. The Keyword Is Passivity. The Sad Consequence Of This Misconception Is: "There Is Hardly Any Activity, Any Enterprise, Which Is Started With Such Tremendous Hopes And Expectations And Yet, Which Fails So Regularly, As Love,"

Love Is The Attachment That Results In Deeply Appreciating Another's Goodness. See What We Value Most In Ourselves, We Value Most In Others. God Created Us To See Ourselves As Good (Hence Our Need To Either Rationalize Or Regret Our Wrong Doings). So, We Seek Goodness In Others. Nice Looks, An Engaging Personality, Intelligence And Talent (All Of Which Counts For Something) May Attract You, But Goodness Is What Moves You To Love. Trust Me! If That Person Doesn't See The Same Goodness In You, Love Is Not Possible Because It Really Takes Two To Love. I Like To Say Give And Receive.

Remember A Person Can't Love If They Don't Want To Be Loved. Love Is A Choice, If Love Comes From Appreciating Goodness, It Needn't Just Happen, Love Is Active. You Can Create It. Just Focus On The Good In Another. If You Can Do This Easily You'll Love Easily But Will Be Venerable To A Lot Of Fake Love In Return And Also Pain.

Obviously, There Is A Far Distance Between Personal Love And Unconditional Love. See Unconditional Love Is Rooted From Within... Only A Person Who Captures Your True Love Will Receive It... Because You See The True Goodness In Them. Actions Affect Feelings. How Can You Deepen Your Love For Someone? Actions Affect Our Feelings The Most. If You Want To Become More Compassionate, Thinking Compassionate Thoughts Will Be A Start. Giving Ultimately Is The Key. While Most People Think That Love Leads To Giving... The Truth Is Actually The Total Opposite, Giving Leads To Love. The First Action Of Giving Is Care, Demonstrating The Active Concern For A Person's Life And Growth. The Second Is Responsibility, Responding To Their Expressed And Unexpressed Needs, Especially Emotional Needs.

The Third Is Respect, The Ability To See A Person As They Really Are, To Be Aware Of Their Unique Individuality And Consequently, Wanting That Person To Grow And Unfold As They Are. These Three Actions All Depend On The Fourth, Knowledge. You Can Care For, Respond To, And Respect Another Only As Deeply As You Know Them.

The Effect Of Genuine Giving Is Profound. It Allows You Into Another Person's World And Opens You Up To Receiving Their Goodness. At The Same Time, It Means Investing A Part Of Yourself In The Other, Enabling To Love That Person As You Love Yourself . In Conclusion Love Is Also A Behavior, A Relationship Thrives When Two Partners Are Committed To Behaving Lovingly Through Continual, Unconditional Giving-- Not Only Saying, "I Love You" But Showing It! "I Love You" But Showing It! See, In The End Love Is Really Overrated And Inexplicable. People Come Into Your Life For A Reason, A Season Or A Lifetime. When You Know Which One It Is, You Will Know What To Do For That Person.

When Someone Is In Your Life For A REASON, It Is Usually To Meet A Need You Have Expressed. They Have Come To Assist You Through A Difficulty, To Provide You With Guidance And Support, To Aid You Physically, Emotionally Or Spiritually. They May Seem Like A Godsend And They Are.

They Are There For The Reason You Need Them To Be. Then, Without Any Wrongdoing On Your Part Or At An Inconvenient Time, This Person Will Say Or Do Something To Bring The Relationship To An End. Sometimes They Walk Away. Sometimes They Act Up And Force You To Take A Stand. What We Must Realize Is That Your Need Has Been Met, Our Desire Fulfilled, Their Work Is Done. The Prayer You Sent Up Has Been Answered And Now It Is Time To Move On.

Some People Come Into Your Life For A SEASON, Because Your Turn Has Come To Share, Grow Or Learn. They Bring You On Experience Of Peace Or Make You Laugh. They May Teach You Something You Have Never Done. They Usually Give You An Unbelievable Amount Of Joy. Believe It, It Is Real. But Only For A Season!

LIFETIME Relationships Teach You Lifetime Lessons, Things You Must Build Upon In Order To Have A Solid Emotional Foundation. Your Job Is To Accept The Lesson, Love The Person And Put What You Have Learned To Use In All Other Relationships And Areas Of Your Life. It Is Said That Love Is Blind But Friendship Clairvoyant. Thank You For Being A Part Of My Life Whether You Were A Reason, A Season Or A Lifetime.

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HOW MEN READ AND INTERPRET WOMEN'S SIGNALS

With All The Confusion Surrounding The Language Of Love, Many Men Would Find It Easier To Learn Japanese. So When Women Give More Mixed Signals Than A Traffic Junction, Men Try To Pare The Body- Data Down To The Basics, Relying On Their Intuition... And A Little Bit Of Shared Reconnaissance. So How Do They Interpret What You're Trying To Tell Them?

Here Are Ways They Are Reading Your Signals...

¤ THE EYE LINE:

It All Starts With The Eyes, So Be Warned: If You've Looked Across A Crowded Room And Held His Gaze For More Than Five Seconds, He Thinks You're Interested. Sure, You May Have Been Staring Because He Reminded You Of Someone, Or He Had A Big Piece Of Spinach In His Teeth, But You Held His Gaze, And That's Enough Of A Signal For Him To Consider Making A Move.

Conversely, If You're Trying To Play It Cool And Deliberately Not Catch His Gaze, Hoping Instead That Playing Coy Will Make Him Do The Running, You Could Be Disappointed. Most Men Will Take It As They See It: If You're Say, Fully Engaged In Conversation With Your Friends And Not Giving Any OF Yourself To The Room, He's Most Likely To Think You're Not Interested And Stay Away. Good News If You Want Him To; Less So If You Were Hoping He'd Pluck Up Courage And Come Over To Talk.

¤ BODY TALK:

If You're On A Date, Or Have Simply Just Met Someone In A Social Situation, The Guy You're With Is Going To Be Looking For Signs Of Interest. If You're Interested, Too, This Is When It's Best To Stop Being Too Cool For School And Abide By Some Of The Conventional Rules Of The Flirting Game. It May Seem Obvious, But Laughing At His Jokes, Smiling While He Talks And Touching His Hair Or Arm Are All Signals He Can Read Loud And Clear.

Take It A Little Further And Reach But To Him Physically And He'll Take That As A Flashing Green Light. Touch His Hand Lightly, Place Your Face Close To His, And Widen Your Eyes When He's Talking: These Are All Signs He'll Have No Trouble Reading. Equally, If Your Eyes Are Wandering, Glazed Over Or Just Plain Dead While He's Talking, That's Not Going To Go Unnoticed, Either.

Most Men Have At Some Point Felt The Distance Of A Disinterested Woman, And Know When They're On A Losing Streak. Not All Give Up When They Do, But When They Do, Many- Especially The Good Ones- Will.

¤ CONVERSATION MATTERS:

Men Feel That Women Drop Codes Into Their Conversation, Saying Things Without Actually Saying Them. For Example, If You're Talking About How Wonderful An Ex Was, That's Simply A Red Flag To Him That You're Not Over It. If You Talk About How Much Attention You Get From Men, He's Likely To Read It As A Signal To Back Off, That You're Telling Him He's Out Of Your League.

Conversely, Complain About A Bad Ex, Or Tell Him How Hard It Is To Meet Interesting Men, And That's A Signal For Him To Step Up. Hopefully He Won't Need Too Much Encouragement To Do So.

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WORK ON THE INNER YOU

I Often Hear Most Ladies Complain Saying "All What Men Want From Them Is Sex...." The Truth Is, If That Is All What Your Man Wants From You, Then That Is The Only Thing He Probably Sees That You Can Offer Him. Because If A Man Sees You Beyond Just A Sexual Partner, Then Sex Wouldn't Be His Primary And Only Reason To Keep You.

I've Often Said That A Lot Of Ladies Need To Work On Their Content, Rather Than Dwelling On Their Outward Look, Dwell On The Inner You.

Men Now Need Women That Can Share Business And Creative Ideas With Them, Not The Ones That Would Come Seeking Ways To Make Him Become A Waster Of Income And Resources.

The Truth Is When A Man Sees You As The Type Who Adds No Value To Him, He Would Also Settle For A Way To Compensate Himself For All He Is Doing For You... And That's Is Where "Sex" Often Becomes An Issue.

NOTE: That Your Man Only Requires Sex From You Doesn't Mean You Are Not Valuable, Oftentimes Its Just That There Are Others Out There Who Are As Valuable As You Are, But Are Willing To Add The Little Extra You Lack.
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RELATIONSHIPS WHERE YOU ARE ASKED TO PROVE YOUR LOVE

I Was About My Daily Activities, And I Was Thinking...

You Know What My Favourite Part Of A Relationship Is? The Part Where
You Have To Prove That You Love The Other Person. Prove That You Love
Me. If You Love Me, You Will Do This For Me. People Are Nuts When They
Do That Crap.

Prove It? You Know, It Kind Of Makes Me Scratch My Head A Little Bit
And Makes Me Think. What, Everything I Have Done Up Into This Moment
Does Not Say That I Love You? Are We Misinterpreting Each Other's
Actions So Much That You Just Don't Understand Anything That I Do?

So Many Times, Somebody Will Say That. If You Really Love Me, You Will
Cancel Your Night Out With Your Friends Tonight, And You Will Come And
Take Me Out To Dinner. Or, If You Really Love Me You Won't Go Visit
Your Friends This Weekend. You Will Fly Around The World To GO See Me.
Prove That You Love Me.

Let Me Tell You Something. You Don't Have Anything. If They Don't
Believe That You Love Them- If They Don't Believe That You Are Into
Them, Then You Know What? Those Relationships Are Not Worth Pursuing.
They Really Aren't. Any Relationship That Causes You Grief- Any
Relationship That Just Driver You Off The Wall And You Have To
Consistently Prove Yourself To Somebody Is A Relationship With A Very
Needy Person. Needy People Always Want Things Proven To Them.

In Reality, Though, The Reason Why They Always Want Things Proven To
Them Is Because They Don't Trust Themselves In The First Place. Prove
That You Love Me. Have You Ever Dated Somebody Like That Where You
Have To Prove Everything, And You Are Constantly On Edge? Share With
Me Today.

THINGS YOU CAN DO TO BETTER YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

We Have One Job In This Life And That Is To Be Authentic In Who We
Are. It Is Easy To Get Pulled Away From Our Commitment To Ourselves In
The World Of Relationships As We Experience The Demands Of Other
People's Thoughts And Expectations Of Who They Would Like Us To Be.

The Greatest Gift You Give To Yourself Is To Just Be You.

Here Are Steps To Being Authentically You:

1¤ KNOW WHO YOU ARE:

When We Know Who We Are We Can Say No When We Need To Say Yes. We Know
What We Like Or Dislike And Are Not Insecure About It Or Other
People's Judgments Of Us. We Are Able To Coast Along In Life With A
Sense Of Well- Being Because We Are Solid Internally. When We Love
Ourselves We Will Not Change Who We Are To Gain Love And Approval.

2¤ AVOID FAKING IT:

Being Too Nice Makes Us Inauthentic. We Do This Because We Do Not Want
To Hurt Anyone's Feelings. So, We Pretend To Like People, Events And
Circumstances We Don't Like. A Certain Amount Of This Is Socially
Acceptable And Necessary. When It Is A Habit And There Is An
Oppressive Worry Of What Others Think About Us- This Is Unhealthy. We
Must Be True To The Truth Of Our Experience And Put That Out Into The
World.

3¤ NO NEED TO AUDITION:

When We Pretend To Be Someone We Are Not, We Set Ourselves Up To Be In
An "Audition" Mode. We Are Always Trying To Be What We Can Sacrifice
Everything To Give People What We Think They Want, When In Reality, We
Have Zero Control Over What People Think. When We Scale Back And
Simply Focus On The Genuineness Of Who We Are, There Is No Need To
Audition.

4¤ OBSERVE:

When Going Into A New Situation, Begin To Assess It From "Is This
Going To Be Good For Me?" And "Is This Going To Add To My Life And
Make Me Feel Good" Rather Than Approaching It From "What Do I Need To
Change Or Do To Be Good Enough For The Situation?"

5¤ BE TRUE TO YOURSELF:

It Is One Thing To Know Who You Are But Another Thing To Truly Act
Upon It. Do What Makes You Happy And Don't Waste One More Minute Of
Your Time Not Feeling Good Enough For Other People. When You Can Be In
This Place, You Will Be Taken More Seriously By Others As Well. When
We Are True To Ourselves, Others Can Sense It And Life Is Much More
Enjoyable.

6¤ WE CANNOT CONTROL WHAT OTHERS THINK:

What Other People Think Of Us Actually Has Very Little To Do With Us.
What They Think Of Us Has To Do With Their Own Prejudices, Fears,
Insecurities And Projections. When We See It From This Place It
Becomes Clear That It Is A Waste Of Time To Be Going Around Pretending
To Have Feelings We Do Not Have In An Effort To Avoid Abandonment And
Gain Approval.

All You Have To Do In This Life To Make It Happy And Significant Is
Just Be You. Be Who You Are. When You Are Out Pretending, You Are Not
Being Authentic. If You Are Not Being Authentic, People Do Not Really
Know Who They Are Dealing With And How To Treat You According To What
Your True Needs Are. There Is No One To Impress, Nothing Needs To Be
Done. Your Being Worthy Has Nothing To Do With Other People.

Little Life Message: We Are Most Loved When We Are Being 100% Ourselves.