AVOIDING THE FIRST DATE DISASTER

Picture This, You Have A Great Chemistry From The Stroke Of Your
Keyboard. You Have Fun Emailing And Sending Instant Messages To Each
Other. He Thinks You're A Knockout. You Think He's Charming. He Seems
Interested In Everything You Are Doing. You Spend An Hour Every Nigh
Chatting Online And Get Several Text Messages During The Day. Are You
In A Relationship? No, Not Really.

Let's Look At Some Ways To Prevent Your First Date From Ending Up A
Dating Disaster.

1¤ TRUST YOUR INTUITION:

Don't Accept A Date When The Phone Conversation Doesn't Feel Right. If
You Don't Have Any Phone Chemistry At All, Or Find Yourself In An
Argument With Your Date Before You Even Meet Them, Don't Schedule A
Date. You Don't Need A Free Meal Or Coffee. If You Put A Date On The
Calendar, Don't Feel Badly About Canceling. Why Waste Each Other's
Time?

Here's An Example Of A First Date Just Ended Up Badly. The Couple's
First Phone Conversation Didn't Go Well. They Had Spent Two Weeks
Building Up A Rapport Of Fantastic Chemistry Through Instant
Messaging. By The Time They Got To The Phone, They Thought They Were
Already A Couple. However, He Didn't Take Time To Listen On The Phone.
He Kept Interrupting Her And Even Started An Argument With Her About
How To Manage Her Career. She Should Have Ended The Conversation With,
"I Don't Think This Relationship Is Right For Me. Good Luck With Your
Search." She Couldn't Get Off The Phone Fast Enough, But Did Not
Cancel Their Upcoming First Date. She Wanted To Give Him The Benefit
Of The Doubt.

Your Intuition Is Very Powerful. You Should Trust. She Ended Up
Meeting Him For Sushi From The Beginning Of The Date Until It Was
Over, He Continued To Argue With Her. She Didn't Like To Eat eel. He
Said That Was Ridiculous. She Ordered Hot Sake. He Insisted That Cold
Sake Was Better. She Wondered Why She Subjected Herself To This Type
Of Communication. If She Trusted Her Intuition From The Initial Phone
Call, She Would Have Realized The Conversation Would Continue In The
Same Light.

2¤ TAKE YOUR DATE FROM ONLINE TO OFFLINE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE:

In This Case, The Couple Had Great "Instant Message" Chemistry And
Emailed And Text Messaged Each Other Frequently. Since They Had
Communicated Mostly Online, They Ended Up With A False Illusion That
They Were In A Relationship. They Got Attached. They Were Not In A
Relationship. They Were Talking To A Computer With A Photo, That's
All. After Several Emails Back-And-Forth, It Was Time For Them To Talk
On The Phone And Move The Relationship Along. The Couple Waited Almost
Three Weeks Before Ever Hearing Each Other's Voices. This Dating
Disaster Could Have Been Prevented Before They Became Too Emotionally
Attached Online.

3¤ NEVER TEXT MESSAGE OTHERS WHILE ON A DATE:

Unless You Want Your Date To End Badly, Keep Your BlackBerry Or iPhone
Off The Table. It's Not An Accessory. It's Rude And Sends A Message
That You Are More Interested In Something Other Than Your Date. Leave
Your Smart Phone In Your Purse Or Wallet. Your Date Deserves Your
Undivided Attention. In This Case, Both Of Them Started To Text
Friends During The Date. It Was An Immediate Turn-Off.

4¤ ALWAYS MEET YOUR DATE IN A PUBLIC PLACE AND DON'T DRIVE TOGETHER:

Remember, Safety First. The Gentleman Suggested Picking Up His Date At
Her Home To Drive 45minutes To One Of His Favourite Restaurants. He
Said He Wanted To Go On A "Real Date." She Knew Better Enough To Say
No To This Request. Always Meet Your Date In A Public Place And Don't
End Up In A Car With Someone You Don't Know On A First Date. In This
Case, She Might Have Ended Up On A Street Corner Alone, Looking For A
Cab Back Home. Better Safe, Than Sorry.

5¤ DO YOUR HOMEWORK AND STUDY FOR THE QUIZ:

Online Dating Is A Numbers Game. However, The More Organized You Are,
The More Successful Your Date Will Be. In This Case, Her Date Thought
She Had Never Been Married And Didn't Remember What She Did For A
Living. If You Are On A Date, Make It Personal And Keep It Light. Take
The Time To Remember Something Your Date Wrote In Their Profile Or
Said On The Phone. Think Of Preparing For Your Date Like You Would For
A Job Interview For Your Dream Job. Would Know The Name Of The Parent
Company You Are Interviewing With? Would You Know The Name Of The CEO
Or City Of Their Headquarters? Would You Recognize Their Company Logo?

Add It All Up, And It Was A Recipe For Disaster Before They Even
Arrived At The Sushi Bar. It Was Destined To Be A Bad Date.

Before You Go On Your Next "First" Date, Make Sure You Are Looking
Forward To It, Do Your Homework, Ask Questions About The Other Person,
Take Time To Listen, And Perhaps You'll Make A New Friend, Even If You
Don't End Up Meeting "The One."

BLOCK OFF EVERY POVERTY MINDSET

To Really Create A Wealth Mentality And A Successful Life, You Must
Block Off Every Poverty Thinking; You Can't Go Far With It. Poverty Is
A Disease Of The Mind That Can Only Be Cured By Knowledge. You Must
Begin To Think Wealth 24/7; You Must See Yourself Successful.

People With A Poverty Mindset Don't See The Possibility Of Becoming
Wealthy. As They Cannot See The Possibility Their Minds Simply Tell
Them Not To Try; They Kind Of Stagnate Mentally. Their Behaviour Will
Definitely Be Affected, As They Will Definitely Develop Self-Defeating
Characters That Will Always Limit Them. They Will Begin To Indulge
Themselves In Wasteful Ventures That Characterize Poor People Losers.

The Root Cause Of Poverty Is Sin, And The Fuel For Poverty Is
Ignorance. If You Can Keep A Man From Acquiring Relevant Knowledge To
Wealth, You Can Keep Him Forever.

Blocking Off Poverty Mentality Is To Make Sure You Are Always Keeping
Yourself Abreast Whth Positive Information On Wealth. Never Allow A
Day Go By Without Opening A Book To Develop Your Mind. I'vE Noticed
That Most People That Are Wealthy But Illiterate Are Always Going With
Their Ears Open To New Ideas And Information, Since They Cannot Read
And Write They Make Sure They Are Informed. Poverty Is Not A Sickness
Of The Black Man But A Sickness Of The Ignorant Man.

As We Rightly Said Your Mind Would Definitely Act On What You Allow
Into It; If You Feed Your Mind Regularly With Thoughts That You Won't
Succeed, Don't Be Surprised If You Don't.

To Effectively Block Poverty Out Of Our Minds, We Must Begin To Study
The Wealthy And Their Behaviour. What They Like And The Quality Of
Their Decisions, We Must Strictly Look Into Their Personal Data And
Know What Keeps Them Going. To Make This Principle Work Very Well We
Must Go The Extra Mile Of Befriending Some Of Them, That Way We Will
Get First Hand The "How To" Of Success. The Moment You Begin To Rub
Minds With Quality People Through Books And Personal Acquaintance It
Will Definitely Wipe Poverty From Your Mind. It's Not Going To Be A
Once In A While Thing, This Must Be LifeLong Thing If You Are Going To
Really Enjoy Wealth.

INTERESTING THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW ABOUT THE CLITORIS

WHERE IS THE CLITORIS AND WHAT IS IT???
The Clitoris Is A Small Pea-Sized Ump Towards The Top Of Vaginal Area
Above The Entrance To The Vagina. It Is Very Sensitive And When
Stimulated Can Lead To Orgasm. You Can Find It On AVERT's Diagram Of
The Female Sex Organs.
With That Being Said, Let Us Introduce You All To Some Interesting
Things You May Not Know About The Clitoris... You'd Be Surprised!
Yup!
¤ IT'S EXQUISITELY SENSITIVE:
The Clitoris Contains At Least 8,000 Sensory Nerve Endings. To Put
That Into Perspective, The Penis Has About 4,000. That Makes This Tiny
Area The Most Sensitive Part Of A Woman's Erogenous Zone. And While
The Clitoris Is Quite Small, Its Powerful Sensation Can Spread Across
A Woman's Pelvic Area By Affecting 15,000 Other Nerve Endings!
¤ ITS A LOT LIKE A PENIS:
Yeah, There's The Whole "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
Camp, But In Reality, Men And Women Are A Lot More Alike Than Most Of
Us Realize. Or, At Least We Start Out That Way. In Fact. All Babies,
Upon Conception, Have The Exact Same Genital Tissue. At About 12
Weeks, Each Baby's Genitalia Begin To Differentiate Into A Penis Or
Labia.
So, In A Sense, The Clitoris And Penis Are The Same Materials Put
Together In A Different Way. The Clitoris Has A Glans, A Foreskin
(Also Known As The Hood), Erectile Tissue And A Teeny-Tiny Shaft. It
Even Swells When It's Aroused! Good Thing It's Mostly Hidden- It
Saves The Ladies From Having To Measure And Compare With Their
Friends... Lol

¤ IT GROWS:

The Clitoris Actually Grows During A Woman's Lifetime. No, It Isn't
Getting Stretched Out From Too Much Sexy Fun. The Growth Occurs As A
Result Of Hormonal Changes In The Body. When A Girl's Puberty Begins,
The Clitoris Will Start Increasing In Size. By The Time Puberty Ends,
The Clitoris Will Be About 1.8 Times Larger. By The Time A Woman Is 32
Years Old, The Clitoris Will Be Almost Four Times As Big As It Was At
The Onset Of Puberty. It Doesn't End There. After Menopause, The
Clitoris Will Be About Seven Times Larger Than It Was At Birth! Don't
Freak Out- This Is Still A Very Small Area, So The Change In Size
Won't Be Very Noticeable. And Hey, It Might Help Explain Why Older
Women Often Report Such Hot Sex!

¤ IT'S ONLY THERE FOR THE SEX:

A Woman's Body Includes A Number Of Super- Hot Erogenous Zones, But
You Might Say Many Of Those Are Sort Of, Well, Incidental. Not The
Clit. It's There For Fun. Yup, That's Right. The Clitoris Is The Only
Part Of The Body Designed Solely For Pleasure. So, While Other Body
Parts Used For Sexual Pleasure Have At Least One Other Purpose To
Them, Your Clit Is Just There To Get You Off.

¤ IT CAN BE AN ORGASM DEAL BREAKER:

Vaginal Orgasms Do Exist, But They're Tricky For A Lot Of Women To
Achieve, And Only 30% Of Women Are Able To Reach Orgasm Through
Penetration Alone. The Rest Require Direct Clitoral Stimulation.
Rubbing, Licking, Sucking Or Sex Toys Will All Do The Trick, Although
Each Clitoris Has Its Own Preferences.

¤ THEY'RE ALL DIFFERENT:

Some Are Small, Some Are Big, Some Are Hidden And Some Protrude Rather
A Lot. Some Increase In Size When Aroused, And Others Hide Under The
Hood. Some Require A Lot Of Pressure, Others Prefer A Very Gentle
Touch. Each Little Love Bud Is As Unique As The Woman Attached To It.
That's Important, Too, Because Getting To Know How It Works And How To
Use It To Produce Pleasure Is Just A Part Of Getting To Know Yourself,
Or Your Lover.

In "Woman: An Intimate Geography," Author Natalie Angier Says That
"The Clitoris Not Only Applauds When A Woman Flaunts Her Mastery; It
Will Give A Standing Ovation." If You Have Yet To Hear Any Clapping,
It's Time To Learn This Little Organ's Quirky Dance. So Here's One
More Helpful Thing You May Not Know That Might Help: The Clitoris
Never Ages. Once It Matures, It Maintains Its Sexual Peak For The Rest
Of A Woman's Life. So, If You Aren't On Good Terms With The Clit In
Your Life, It Isn't Too Late To Start Getting Acquainted.

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT DATING WITH DEPRESSION (AFTER A BREAKUP)

A Painful Breakup Can Cause You To Fall Into Depression. You Miss Your
Ex (Even If You Know The Breakup Is For The Best), You're Feeling
Miserable And Crying Often, Or Maybe You Just Feel Numb And Empty. You
Might Be Second-Guessing Yourself, Feeling Bad About Yourself, Having
Trouble Concentrating At Work, And Can't Sleep Or Eat Normally.

My First Suggestion Is To Definitely Seek Professional Help If It
Feels Unmanageable- Most People Who Get Help Find Relief From Their
Symptoms. When You're Ready, Ease Back Into Dating By Considering The
Following:

1¤ WHEN YOU'RE DEPRESSED, THERE'S A TENDENCY TO EXCESSIVELY SEEK
REASSURANCE WHEN ENTERING A NEW RELATIONSHIP:

Excessive Reassurance Seeking Means That You Are Looking To Your Date
To Boost Your Self-Esteem By Confirming That You're Worthy And
Lovable. You Look For Signs That The Person Really Like You, And Then
Even When You Receive Those Signs, You May Question Them. How Much
Does The Person Really Like You? Are They Really Going To Stick
Around? You May Ask For COnfirmation Of How Much They Really Care For
You. This Type Of Behaviour Can Be Overwhelming And A Turn Off To
Potential Dates If You're Constanly Questioning How They Feel About
You.

Instead, Gently Remind Yourself. That Your Depressed Mood Can Make You
Extra Sensitive And Insecure, And Remember That There's A Certain
Amount Of Trust And Faith You Need To Put In A New Person Your
Developing A Relation With. Remind Yourself That Asking For
Reassurance All The Time Won't Really Help You Strengthen Your New
Relationship, It Can Hurt It, Instead, Focus On Giving Yourself
Affirmations- Focusing On Your Own Sense Of Self-Worth. And Rather
Than Seek Reassurance, You Can Simply Notice How You Feel When You're
Around Your Partner. If They Are Treating You Well, Are Interested In
Seeing You, And Are Treating You Consistently Well, Then Let Their
Actions Serve As Reassurance To You-Without Having To Ask For It.

2¤ THE TIMING DOESN'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT:

When You're Depressed After A Difficult Breakup, It Can Be Really Hard
To Know When It Is Time To Start Dating Again. On One Hand, You Need
To Give Yourself Time To Heal-The First Days Or Weeks After An Intense
Breakup, You May Not Be In A Great Place To Date And It's Okay And
Completely Normal Not To Want To Date. Take Some Time To Reflect On
The Relationship: What Did You Learn From It? What Do You Want To Be
Different In Your Next Relationship? Self-Reflection Can Be Helpful,
But Be Aware That Too Much Self-Reflection Can Become Ruminating-Going
Over The Same Problems Or Regrets Over And Over, Which Can Keep You
Stuck In Depression Rather Than Moving Forward. Next, Recognize That
You Don't Always Have To Be 100% Over Your Ex In Order To Start Dating
Again. Depression Makes You Feel Helpless, So Sometimes Getting Out
And Dating Again Helps You Feel More In Control Of Your Life. Plus,
Meeting Someone New Can Be Really Wonderful.

3¤ STRATEGIZE WHEN PLANNING:

Since You're More Vulnerable To Feeling Rejected Or Upset If A Date
Doesn't Go Well, Make Sure You Plan Activities With Your Friends After
A Date, And Don't Stake All Of Your Happiness On The Success Of One
Date. Make Dating A Fun Part Of Your Life Rather Than The Center Of
It.

4¤ MAKE AN EFFORT TO FOCUS ON YOUR DATE:

Depression Can Make You Very Aware Of Your Own Inner Pain And
Suffering- Your Focus Becomes Overly Internal. This Can Make It Hard
To Be Truly Interested In Someone Else. And Yet To Really Connect With
Someone New, There Has To Be A Willingness To Earn About Them. A Good
Strategy Is To Stay Engaged With Your Date By Asking Them Questions,
And Making An Effort To Really Listen When They Answer. Not Only Will
This Help You Connect With Them, But It Can Your Improve Your Mood
When You're Actively Engaged In A Discussion.

5¤ REMIND YOURSELF THAT THE FUTURE DOES HOLD POSSIBILITY:

Depression Makes Your Own Future Look Bleak: It Tricks You Into
Believing The Future Doesn't Hold Promise For Your Love Life, And
Keeps You Hyper-Focused On The Negative Side Of Things.

You Are Much More Prone To Focusing On Your Own Perceived Negative
Qualities, And Seeing Things Generally With More Pessimism. While You
Certainly Don't Have To Pretend That Everything Is Roses, I Suggest
Trying To Identify One Positive Thing Daily About Your Life That Will
Help You Reframe Your Mindset. Remind Yourself Of The Good Friends You
Have, Celebrate When Things Go Well At Work, Or Call To Mind Past
Positive Experiences You've Had In Dating. If It's Hard To Identify
Favourable Things, Enlist The Help Of A Friend. Sometimes A Friend Or
Family Member Who Knows You Well Can See The Positive Things In You
And In Your Life That You May Have Trouble Recognizing. In Addition To
This, Plan Things For Yourself That Help You Anticipate And Look
Forward To The Future.

6¤ REMEMBER TO BE KIND TO YOURSELF:

Negative Self-Talk, Like "I'm A Failure" Or "No One Wants Me" Or
"Things Will Never Get Better" Can Be So Defeating, And You Can Start
To Believe All Of The Negative Things About Yourself And Your Dating
Prospects. So Pay Attention To These Thought Patterns. When You Notice
A Negative Thought, Label It "Thats A Negative Thought" Or "That's A
Depressed Thought", And Gently Let It Go.

REACTING TO PEOPLE'S POST AND COMMENTS

I Believe Most Of Us Are Familiar With Those So Called Offensive Posts
That Often Gets Us Angry And Wanting To Pour Out All The Insults In
The World On That Person. Yeah! I Think Its Vital That Most Of Us
Understand How To Relate And Communicate Effectively, Especially
Having It At The Back Of Our Minds That We Are From Different
Background, And As Such We Would All Reason Differently On Certain
Issues.

When You Find That Offensive POST That Makes You Want To Yell Out Your
Lungs Sore With Insultive Words, I Think Its Best You Just Shut Up, Or
If You Must Comment Atall, Let It Be Reasonable And Show A Great Deal
Of Maturity In Your Comment. Because If All That Could Come Out Of You
To The Poster Is "You Are Stupid" "Rubbish Post" "You Are A Fool" "Ask
Google" E.t.c. On A Post That Nobody Tagged You, Or Made It Compulsory
That You Comment. Then I Think Your Standards Are Low To A Fault And
Immature.

I Have Said This Time And Time Again In The Various Groups I Admin,
That If You Don't Like A Post Or You Find It Offensive, You Have The
Choice Of Skipping It, Or Giving A Sound Note Of Correction And Not
One Filled With Insults In A Way That The Owner Of The Post Would
Respect You.

A Person's Post Is Like His/Her House, They Open Doors To Their Kind
And Those Who Have Something To Share Regarding What They Posted. So
You Jumping IntO Their House To Insult Them Because You Don't Like
What They Are Doing When They Did Not Invite You Is Very Wrong. It
Could Get You What You Never Bargained For.

Most Of The Post That I Notice Attracts Insults Are The Post Talking
About "SEX." Yes! Some People Can Be Very Extreme In Their Posts When
Talking About SEX. But Does That Mean It Shouldn't Be Discussed At
All? I Don't Think So. Because Be It Now Or Later, SEX Is Something
Most Us Would Engage In As Far As We Ain't Chosing A Life Of Celibacy.
Therefore, I See No Reason Why Anyone Should Get Angry When The Topic
Comes Up. If You Don't Like It, Then Skip It And Stop Intruding On
Such Posts To Show To The World That You Are godly And Decent. If You
Are That godly And Decent, Why Can't You Take Your Eyes Of The POST
And Move On, Rather Than Throwing Tantrums In The Four Winds? If You
Are That godly Don't You Think Preaching And Talking Right About Your
Belief On The Matter Would Show You Are Responsible?

Now To Those Who POST Nonsense And Yet Expecting People To Comment
Sensibily, Don't You Think You Need A Brain Reset??? What You Give Is
What You Get. Therefore, I Expect People To Think Through Their POSTS
Before Making It Public. As Posting In GROUPS Is Different From
Posting On Your Wall. So Lets Be Reasonable In Our POSTS And
COMMENTS... It Says A Lot About Us.